Managing the Cost of Your Child’s Wedding

By Nanette Stevens

WEDDING COSTS TODAY can be overwhelming, and traditions around who pays for what have changed dramatically. Instead of a strict split between families, it’s now common for everyone—including the couple—to contribute in a way that feels fair and feasible.

Having just celebrated our own daughter’s wedding, I can say firsthand that the day can be both magical and manageable. We had a wonderful experience—filled with joy, laughter, and not as much stress as we expected. Clear planning and honest conversations early on made all the difference.

Here are a few lessons we learned along the way:

Start with a realistic budget.

Know what you can comfortably contribute before promising an amount. The Trust Company of Vermont can help you update your retirement plan to determine a number that fits your long-term goals—so you don’t jeopardize your future for one big event.

Communicate openly with the couple.

Once you set a contribution amount, share it right away. When everyone understands the financial framework, the process becomes smoother—and in our case, it allowed us to enjoy the entire experience without tension or surprises.

Look for smart ways to save.

Guest count is the biggest cost driver. A smaller ceremony followed by a larger, more relaxed celebration later can be a lovely—and budget-friendly—option. Off-season or weekday weddings can also significantly reduce expenses.

In the end, the most valuable gift isn’t financial—it’s your love, support, and presence. For us, seeing our daughter so happy made every moment feel effortless.